Voices
by L. Drayton
Summary: Voices. What lengths does Merlin have to go to in this fight to banish the voices from his head? And can he complete this task before his condition worsens?
1. Beginning

The chamber was empty. A cold spirit encased the room which Merlin knew so well, like it had done for the last 5 weeks. Gaius was gone. Merlin placed a had on the wall to steady himself, he feared he would have fainted if he had not done so. The voices started to whisper.

Voices plagued Merlin, right through his mind. They didn't leave him for more than a few hours, then they would come back. They'd keep coming back. They wouldn't let him sleep. They wouldn't let him be awake. They wanted him dead.

He knew it was happening to him. He was destined to die. The voices jeered and laughed at how weak he was. They had, as they said, expected more resistance from him. Merlin keeled over, his hand never leaving the wall. He was dying slowly, and no one exept him knew.

The voices tormented him. Reminded him of who he had lost and who he was going to lose. They mocked him. Then, Merlin had enough. He shook his head vigarously, blocked is ears, stamped his foot. The voices stopped. They had to. They knew he could kill them if he straightened out his head.

Merlin breathed heavily and started weeping as he slumped down onto the floor. He wasn't ready. He wasn't ready to die. He had so much to do. So many people to meet. So many battles to win. So many to lose. He wasn't ready to die, but he didn't see a way around it. He was going to fall. His life would soon be over, as the voices said.

He stumbled to his room. He collapsed on his cot and placed a hand on his brow. Everytime they scraped his head, it left him weak. No one had noticed. Not even Arthur. Gwen hadn't. Nor had Lancelot. Nor had Gwaine, Percivil, Leon. He hadn't wanted anyone to notice. He wanted to live his life as they were; as if nothing had happened.

Merlin felt tired. Very tired. Ever since he got ill, he was scared to go to sleep. He might never wake up.


	2. Revealation

Merlin had been lucky enough to wake up. He didn't see it that way. Merlin didn't get any sleep that night so it didn't take much to wake up nice and early. The voices never left him alown. They just wouldn't. Merlin was getting sick of them. One time they got so bad that he got up and hit his head against the wall. He had a bruise on his forhead now. That bruise would definatley come up in conversation.

The voices had stopped now. They'd left him for only about 10 minutes. He was just getting used to them being gone. The first thing he did was to wash his face. Ever since the voices had started at night, Merlin had always emerged from his bed, drenched in sweat. That day was no exception. He had to be careful whilst washing, his forhead hurt, and it would hurt more if he pushed the cloth onto it too hard.

Merlin then grabbed Arthur's breakfast from the kitchen's, missing his own. He never ate anything anymore. And headed to Arthur's chamber's to wake him up and give his breakfast to him.

"Rise and shine, Sleeping Beauty!" Merlin called out to Arthur, whilst pulling back the curtains. He tried hard to act casual, but inside he was begining the voices to stay away whilst he was with Arthur.

"Merlin. Shut up." He grumbled from underneath the bedcovers.

"As you wish, sire. But, if you don't wake up now, you'll be late for the knighting, won't you?" Merlin said. Arthur sat bolt upright. He'd forgotten about the knighting.

"Curse you, Merlin." He said sleepily, rubbing his eyes. Merlin threw Arthur's clothes at him and Arthur slipped behind the screen to put them on. "You polished these buttons right?"

"Yes, sire."

"And you-"

"Yes. Breakfast is on the side."

"Oh. When did you get up this morning?"

"Early enough to get a few jobs done."

_Merrrliiiinnn. _They called to him. This attack was going to bad. One of the worse.

_Oh God. No, no, no. They are NOT going to talk to me. I'm going to block you out. LA LA LA LA LA! _

"Merlin? I asked what happened to your head." Merlin snapped out of trying to block them out for just a second, a second was long enough. The voices came flooding in. Merlin knew that Arthur would find out, and he couldn't help it anyway. He collapsed into a ball and clawed at his ears. He heard Arthur calling Merlin's name, then he felt Arthur's hand on his side. But the voices were weakening him. So much so that he almost became too weak to breath. Then they stopped, leaving him barely alive. One more attack like that, and Merlin might not be so lucky.


	3. Talking

The candles flickered in the cool breeze of Merlin's room. He was lying on his cot, every breath felt heavy and he was partly aware of a figure sitting in the corner of his room. He didn't open his eyes, they hurt. He suddenly realised that something. Someone had moved him to his cot. However, he was too weak to think straight for long without his head hurting. That attack had definatley been the worse one so far, and now his secret was out. Merlin suddenly became very curious about who the figure in the corner was, and he opened his eyes to see.

"Morning." The figure said. It was Arthur.

Merlin couldn't speak. His mouth was dry and it didn't want to move for him.

"Don't worry. I've managed. I'm not completley useless, you know."

Merlin managed a smile.

"There we go!... So, are you going to tell me what happened?"

He nodded slowly.

"When? It's okay if you can't yet. Want some water?"

Merlin nodded again. It felt wierd having Arthur care for him. It felt wierd having_ anyone _care for him , now that Gaius was gone. Gaius would be back soon, but it was still strange. Merlin still wished that he'd told Gaius about the voices before he'd left.

Arthur trudged of to get the water. Merlin tryed to make his mouth work. He found he could speak to an extent. Which was just as well, seeing as he'd have to explain everything to Arthur. Arthur appeared with some water. He handed it to Merlin, and helped him to sit up so that he could drink it.

"Thanks." Merlin said, in a raspy voice. He coughed a bit and Arthur looked at him, strangley.

"Right. Go."

Merlin gulped.

"Voices."

"Voices?" Arthur took a seat on the end of the cot and looked at Merlin, carefully. It wasn't normal to hear voices, well, as far as Arthur was concerned.

"Yeah...In-in my head."

"What sort of things do they say?" Merlin rubbed his head. He wasn't sure how to answer.

"They... I-I'm not sure. They all... sp-speak at once." Merlin's voice was juttery, he found it hard to speak, and he felt bad lying.

"I see. How many do you think there are?" Arthur was entrigued.

"I don't know!... I'm tired." Merlin suddenly realised.

"You would be. I don't get it though- we'll talk later." He got up to leave.

Merlin fell asleep.


	4. Telling

**BTW, I've slightly changed chapter one... a bit. Just so that I can make things simpler ( Is that a word?(: ). So, Gaius ISN'T DEAD. He was just out on a trip. Sorry! I didn't really think it through! SORRY GUYS!**

* * *

><p>Merlin felt much better when he'd woken up. That didn't mean that he'd managed to evade the voices that night. But, they weren't speaking then, so he sat up and listened to the discussion going on outside his room. He knew Gaius was back, but he didn't have the energy to run out and great him from his trip.<p>

"Voices, you say?"

"That's what he told me, and it didn't sound as if he was lying. Has he said anything to you about it, Gaius?"

"No. I'll speak with him when he wakes up." Merlin heard footsteps. He wasn't worried. He knew it was just Gaius and Arthur.

The door creaked open slowly and Gaius stepped in. When he realised Merlin was awake, he came and sat down near the top of the cot, so he was quite close to Merlin. Arthur sat at the end of the bed, where he'd sat earlier.

"I can't leave you for five minutes, can I, Merlin?" Gaius said. He put his hand on Merlin's forhead and shook his head.

"You can. Just not 5 weeks." Merlin retorted, playfully.

"Arthur's been telling me about these voices. Anything you want to tell me?" Merlin glanced at Arthur. He wasn't looking their way, he was studying the room. Merlin raised his eyebrows at him and Gaius nodded. He understood.

Gaius stood. "Right, we'll leave you to rest then, Merlin." Arthur nodded and they both left the room. Gaius took care to be the last out so that he could sneek a wink at Merlin before he dissapeared behind the door.

"Thank you for looking after him, sire." Gaius was getting Arthur out of the room.

"I didn't want him to lie shivering on the floor of my chambers al day."

"I'm sure."

Merlin decided that he wasn't going to lounge around in bed all day. He shooved his boots on his feet and pulled on his jacket. Those were the only items he was not wearing. Arthur must have removed them whilst he was putting him in his cot.

He looked through a hole in his door and saw that Arthur had left. He opened the door and went to sit with Gaius. Gaius turned around to look at him properly.

"Now. What was it you wanted to tell me?"

"Lots of things really. These voices. They don't leave me alown. They keep screeching and mocking me about how week I am. About all the people I've lost in my life."

"Do you let them get to you?"

"I don't know!" Merlin threw his hands up, exasperated. "Everytime they speak to me, I end up feeling weak."

"Hmmm. How long have they been talking to you?"

"About 5 weeks. They started just before you left. I don't know where they came from. But they..."

"They what, Merlin?"

"Thay want me dead."


	5. Emotion

"What? How do you know this?" Gaius quizzed, suddenly scared.

"They tell me." Merlin seamed to be finding it hard to talk to Gaius about the voices. This upset Gaius, but he understood why. Merlin suddenly started sobbing. He screwed up his face and started stamping his foot. Gaius was concerned, but he knew what was happening. They were speaking. He placed a hand on Merlin's shoulder but Merlin swatted him away, obviosly pained. After about 2 minutes, Merlin stopped. He turned and looked at Gaius. He looked tired, his eyes red. Merlin knew what was goign to happen next, it seamed, as he shook his head. But he couldn't prevent it. Gaius had to catch Merlin when he passed out.

Gaius managed to get Merlin into his cot and then he decided to call on Arthur.

The physician knocked on Arthur's door.

"Come in." Came the reply from the other side. Gaius stepped into the room. "Ah, Gaius. Why are you here?"

"I bring news of Merlin's condition." Arthur gestured for Gaius to sit down and he did. Arthur joined him.

"Is he all right?"

"He's asleep. I _think _we might have a problem on our hands, though."

"What sort of problem?"

"Well, I witnessed the effects of what the voices do to him. He gets very... emotional."

"All I saw earlier was him shivering... Where did these voices come from?"

"I'm affraid I do not know. It upsets me to see him like this though. I have no idea what to do about it."

"Well I don't know what to do. Maybe we should go and talk with him."

"I'm not waking him up. These voices leave him very... drained of energy. He passed out straight infront of me!"

"Well. When he wakes up. Make sure you call me. I'm intrigued by these voices which are plaguing him."

"You have me word, sire." Gaius stood to leave. He was about to exit the room when Arthur called from his seat.

"Gaius, make sure he's all right." Gaius nodded, then made his way back to his chambers.

He poked his head 'round Merlin's door and smiled at Merlin sleeping peacefully. Then he stopped smiling: Merlin started shivering violently. Tears fell down his face and he cryed out. Gaius rushed forward and knelt by Merlin. There was nothing he could do but watch. Suddenly, Merlin's eyes shot open. He stopped shivering and Gaius knew that the voices had stopped. Merlin didn't stop sobbing. Gaius pulled him into a hug.

"It's all right, Merlin. We're going to help you." Gaius shushed him. He knew Merlin would be weak and tired, but it seamed the voices didn't leave him in his dreams, either.

"I'm scared... Gaius." Merlin said into Gaius' shoulder. He was tired, and it was hard for him to speak.

"There's no need to be, Merlin. I'm going to help you. So is Arthur. Do you want me to call on you'r mother?" But Merlin ad fallen asleep. Gaius layed him back down in his bed, and decided that he wasn't going to leave the room untill Merlin was on his feet. He couldn't leave him when he was being attacked like this every 5 minutes.

So Gaius pulled up a chair and watched as the warlock slept, knowing that at any moment, he could be needed.


	6. Help

_There has to be something in here._

Merlin was looking through his magic book, trying to find a spell that would make the voices go. He couldn't find one. Then he got an idea.

Merlin threw on his jacket and boots and slipped outside the chamber's. He didn't want Gaius to notice he was gone because he'd just stop him from going.

He weaved through the crowd until he was far from Camelot, in a clearing. He started shouting out jibberish and not soon afterwards, he heard a deep roar, and the dragon appeared infront of him.

_What is it, young Warlock?_

"I don't have much time. I need your help."

_Again?_

"Yes, I'm sorry. But I can't take it anymore."

_What is ill with Camelot?_

"Um... It's not so much Camelot..."

_Arthur?_

"No, it's more... me."

_You? This is most amusing! You don't need my help, Merlin. Nothing is wrong with you. You are fine the way you are._

Merlin shook his head. "No one is fine if they're hearing voices."

_Voices? _Kilgarrah lost all signs of joking.

"Yes. I don't know where they came from or why... but I will surely die if they go on much longer."

_This is indeed serious. It is rare for any creature of magic to hear voices unless by enchantment._

"That must be it then. I'm enchanted. Great."

_I am affraid that is the conclusion I have come to. How often do they... speak with you?_

"All the time. I'm lucky they aren't talking to me now."

_Now that you mention it, Merlin. Something _is _trying to get into your mind. It is strong, but I'll keep it away while we speak._

"Can't you keep it away forever?" Merlin sighed.

_I cannot. I can only help you through it. If we discover who is holding the spell, then of course I will help you to destroy the personage responsible._

"Destroy? Isn't that a bit too much?"

_Kindness is in your nature, Merlin. But it is them or you._

Merlin thought for a while and there was silence.

_I must depart now, young one. I will help, but there is nothing I can do at the present._

"Thank you."

_Until we meet again. Oh, I warn you, do not listen to what they say to you. I have heard of similar accounts where listening to what they said, didn't help to say the least._

And then the dragon departed. And voices flooded into Merlin's mind. He sat on the ground with his head in his hands and tryed as best as he could to block the voices out. He tryed to block them out but they knew what he was trying to do and came back harder until Merlin lost it.

_GET OUT OF MY HEAD! _He screamed. Silence. Then slow laughter as the voices faded.

Merlin shook off his drowsiness and ran back to his room. By the time he was back in his cot, he couldn't even be bothered to breathe from exhaustion.


	7. Eyes

Merlin remained still on the bed, a small smile on his lips. Gaius sighed; Merlin would be woken up soon: the voices. Gaius could now predict a slight schedual as to when they would speak to Merlin. Well, torment is always a better word to describe it. Gaius watched Merlin sleeping from the doorway for a few more seconds, then he closed the door and returned to the main area.

Gaius heard Merlin muttering, pained. He rushed to the door and peaked in at Merlin. He was tossing about fitfully, a pained expression on his face. The old physician hated the way that only a moment ago, Merlin had seamed so content, but now...

Merlin's eyes shot open. For a moment the sparkle in his eyes disapeared and instead his eyes displayed fear, but only for a second: the feeling displayed soon turned to tiredness. Merlin need only look at Gaius, who was about to wake Merlin up before Merlin had beat him to it, to start weeping uncontrolablly.

"Hush..." Gaius muttered as he hugged his sobbing ward close. Merlin didn't hug back and when Gaius looked down to see if the boy had hopefully fallen asleep, he saw Merlin staring into his eyes. Nothing but pure sorrow was reflected in his child like eyes.

"I-" Merlin started, but he was cut of by his own yawn.

"Hush, my boy. Sleep." Merlin yawned again and became a dead weight in Gaius' arms. The young boy's guardian gently layed the raven down in the cot. Then he excited the room.

Not long after Arthur knocked on the door.

"Come in, sire." Gaius called from his bench.

Arthur entered the chambers and immediatley glanced at thedoor leading to his manservant's room. Gaius sadly shook his head in response.

"He's asleep, sire. I wish not to disturb him." Arthur nodded and sat on a chair.

"How has he been?" Arthur asked.

"Well, other than yesterday he's been fine, sire."

"Yesterday? What happened yesterday?" Arthur enquired.

"He went out yesterday... he doesn't know I know. He came back quite late last night completley worn out."

"Why didn't you stop him?"

"I didn't realise until I noticed him gone."

"Hmm... have you got any idea about where he went?"

"No... I'm affraid I don't, sire. I intend to ask though."

"Good. Gaius, Should I be here?"

"... I don't believe it would make things any easier, my lord."

"Then I shall depart. Be sure to call for me, Gaius."

"I swear to it.".

"Good. I'll be leaving then." And with that, Arthur excited.

A few minutes later, an extremeley tired Merlin appeared in the doorway. A small smile played apon his lips as he yawned and stretched.

"Morning, Merlin."

"Morning."

"Sleep well?"

Merlin shot him a look. His eyes looked full of jittery magic. His eyes had returned to thier normal appearence. Well, as close to normalas they could look, now-a-days.

"Sorry. Um, listen..."

"I'm listening." Merlin said. No sign of any emotion in his voice.

"Where did you go last night?" Gaius couldn't stop the words from tumbling out of his mouth. Merlin stiffened. Then he sighed and came to sit next to his mentor.

"Kilgarrah."

"Merlin! Where did you meet?"

"The clearing outside Camelot."

"What did he say?" Gaius was angry at Merlin for leaving, but seen as Merlin had left, he might aswell try and find out what his ward was told.

"That someone was behind all of the voices. That it was rare for someone like me to hear voices. And that he'd help me look for the person responsible... I think. He tends to speak in riddles."

"Merlin, this news is brilliant! Oh, my boy!" Gaius hugged Merlin out of happiness. THERE WAS HOPE! Merlin was a bit shocked but he hugged Gaius back and then he withdrawed from the warm hug with a start and rushed off.

"Where are you going?"

"The dragon."

"But you saw him last night!" Gaius protested.

"Gaius. He has news! He just called me." Merlin said before rushing out of the chamber.

* * *

><p>"You called?"<p>

_I did indeed sumon you, young warlock._

"Well?"

_I have descovered the personage responsible for your suffering._

"And?"

_You will not be surprised when I tell you that the witch, Lady Morgana, is responsible._

"Can you...kill her?"

_With you. But I cannot go today._

"Tonight?"

_Of course. I shall meet with you here. _

"Until tonight, then." Merlin bowed and the dragon lowered his head. Merlin smiled with relief and as he walked back to Camelot, his eyes sparkled with relief and everyone who saw him commented on their brilliant blue sparkle as he passed.


	8. Author's Note

**Author's Note**

**I just thought that I should tell everyone out there how greatful I am that yo guys are sticking with me. I think everyone who is reading my story is AMAZING! **

**Also, I love all the guys who added me or my story to Author Alert or Story Alert or favourite's. **

**Thank you soo much everyone. It means alot to me that you're still reading.**

**Olivia-Rose (Livy)**


	9. Dagger

Merlin hummed as he flicked through his magic book. The spells seamed to lift from the page and float around Merlin. The young warlock was happy. He would be free of the voices once more! Everything would return to normal once Morgana was killed. Of course the voices still plagued him throughout the day, of course they did. But Merlin was no longer upset by them. He just ignored them and pushed them aside, not caring to listen as Kilgarrah had advised.

_Ah ha!_

Merlin read the spell again and tried to learn it.

"Here goes nothing." Merlin uttered the spell quietly and his eyes flashed gold. He just hoped his spell had worked. There was no way of telling at the present.

_Merliinnn._

_I'm coming._ Merlin said to Kilgarrah. He was ready. He slammed his book back in the gap in the floor and slid the piece of wood back over it. He rushed out, not even stopping to put on his jacket as he rushed out the door in a flurry.

"Where are you off to now, Merlin?" Gaius shouted as Merlin whisked past him.

"To finally get my life back!" The raven screeched from down the hall.

* * *

><p><em>Let us be leaving.<em>

"Where is she anyway?"

_The forest of Asitir. _

Let's go then.

* * *

><p>The journey was a painful one. Every step brought Merlin closer to winning his life back and yet, at the same time, every step brought Merlin even closer to being a murderer. The sky got darker and darker as he proceeded further into the forest, the Great Dragon circling up ahead, so he decided to utter one of his most useful spells.<p>

"Liot." He uttered. A ball of light appeared in his hand and Merlin kept it there. Soon it was so dark that Merlin couldn't see his feet on the ground.

_I see the witch. Stop! She is right infront of you._

Merlin snapped his hand and the light disappeared from his fingers. He crouched behind what he supposed what was a bush and watched as the spell he had cast earlier took effect. Morgana suddenly became viable, thanks to the spell. Well, her outline at least.

_What do I do now? _Merlin hissed at the dragon above him.

_I would confront her._

Hmph. Great. Now he had to confront her. Perfect.

He strang from the bush he was hiding behind and he heard Morgana gasp.

"Who's there?" Morgana asked, menecingly. Merlin saw her outline spinning around franticly.

"It is me, Morgana." Morgana immediatley spun to face Merlin, which Merlin thought was amazing seeing as she could not see him.

"Ah. I was expecting you, _Merlin._"

"Call off the spell, Morgana."

"Hmm... let me just think about that... NO!" She raised what Merlin could guess was a dagger by the way she was holding it.

_Be ready. _Merlin called to the dragon.

"Why should I? With you driven insane by voices in your tiny little head, Arthur will be completely broken, so will many of his knights and Gwen and Gaius. Many will be effected by your madness. It's better than you being dead."

"Maybe you'll change your mind."

"Nothing you can do or say can convinse me."

"Maybe not. But I'm not the only one here."

On que, the dragon swooped down, illuminating Morgana's terrified face and her dagger with fire as he scorched the trees to create space to land.

"Withdraw, Morgana." Merlin said, threateningly. She stepped back looking around franticly for a place to run to. "Withdraw!" The dragon roared. Morgana dropped her dagger and ran into the forest.

"After her!" Merlin yelled. The dragon lowered his head and the young warlock ran up it, ready to fly to catch the witch. As they flew, Kilgarrah illuminated their path with fire. Morgana occasionaly threw spells at them. Not one caught either of the two.

"Please!" She yelled as she ran. "Please! I'll call off the attacks! Just please don't hurt me!"

_The witch cannot be trusted. We should just kill her._

"I want to trust her. Let's see what she has to say."


	10. Fire

"What is it, Morgana?"

"I just thought you'd like to know that I am not affraid to die, Merlin." She smiled. He wouldn't have the guts to kill her... but the dragon standing behind him probably would if provoked. Then, she saw the glimmer of an idea creep into the young warlock's eyes and she stared into them, menacingly. She prepared herself for the upcoming bluff.

"You obviously don't want to know who Emrys is then, do you?" Morgana hesitated. How would Merlin know of such a thing? It _had _to be a bluff. Merlin couldn't know who Emrys was, he was a servant!... He had kept his magic a secret all this time, though. It could be a possibility. Morgana quickly formed her own plan and was very concious about letting it show through her eyes.

"Oh, tell me who he is!" She played along with Merlin's little game and it amused her to see him believing her.

"If you lift my curse, I shall." Merlin pulled his hand behind his back and crossed his fingers. Morgana nodded, innocently. Her own fingers crossed.

"For many years I have been waiting for this information, Merlin. You will never know how greatful I am to be told this information. But please, enlighten me. How do you know of Emrys, when Gaius has never heard of the sorceror in question?" Ha! She had him now. But her glee wore off when she saw the raven's reaction was not hesitant.

"I hear rumors on the streets of Camelot, but ones related to magic, I keep to myself." Morgana could see why he would do such a thing. To reveal secrets to anyone, would be like revealing a dirty secret in his family. She sighed as she decided that the man was not lying.

"Then, I should like to know." She moved closer, Merlin moved away, proving he was scared of her and her powers.

"Release my curse first." He demanded. Morgana thought for a moment. She decided to lift his curse: it would be more fun to kill him with his curse lifted, then he would have no excuse for letting a girl beat him. He would look like a weakling in his grave. She smiled at this harsh idea.

Morgana uttered a spell to lift the curse and was annoyed at Merlin's look of suspicion.

_Is it gone? _

_I believe so, young warlock. I do not sense it's presence._

_Very well..._

_I have faith that you are not keeping to your word._

_I am not. Be prepared for a hasty retreat._

_I am always ready, young warlock._

"Now reveal your secrets, Merlin! We had a deal." Morgana uttered a spell and her knife reappeared in her hand which was still behind her back. She felt the weight of the knife in her hand, judging how hand it would be to throw...

"I will never tell you anything!" Merlin jumped up onto his little pet dragon and the two prepared to get away. But Morgana had a trick up her sleeve, well, behind her back.

"Cyrraedd fy targed!" She exclaimed as she flung her knife through the bitter cold air. She heard the satisfying scream errupting from the freshly stabbed warlock. And then her smile faded as she heard the flap of ancient wings slicing through the night air. Her eyes felt hot as the fire from the trees warmed them . Fire was reflected in her pupils as she heard the deafening roar of a determined dragon. Then suddenly, the fire was creeping up her dress, scorching her skin, digging at her soul. She finally let go, letting the dark claim her. The last image she ever saw whilst she was alive was a dragon flying into the pitch black of the night, a slouching warlock hanging on to it weakly, and she wondered why she chose that life of evil.


	11. Arranging

Merlin lay on the flat rock of the cave as blood continued to flow freely from his wound as it had done for days. The dragon had done all he could, but he knew that the physician must treat him. A mortal wound is to be treated with mortal remedies, it wasn't right to take the easy way out. And besides, Merlin would want to be treated by Gaius. But how to get him to Camelot where the physician dwelled?

Then, he got an idea.

_Arthur... _The dragon smiled as he felt the connection being made.

_Who is this who has the nerve to enter my mind? Leave it!_

_I am the one who you thought you had killed. I shall tell you no more, it would interupt your destiny to know so much._

_I am the King! Do not speak to me about destinies! You will leave me now, Ancient One._

_Yes. I believe you are king. I also believe that you would be wise not to dismiss me so quickly._

_And why would that be?_

_I have something of value to you. _The dragon could feel the King stiffen.

_What?_

_Your servant._

_If you have done anything to him, I swear I will hunt you down and-_

_I mean no harm. In fact, I contact you this way to protect him._

_Explain yourself, Ancient One. I have no wish for this. Tell me where you are keeping my servant._

_You shall come to the clearing outside Camelot. I will not be there, as I wish to remain a secret, but I will leave the boy there. _

_I will be waiting._

_Pendragon. You should know. Your servant is in dire need of a physician. I found him with a stab wound. I cannot stop the bleeding. _The dragon could easily sense the King's worry.

_If this is a sick trick. I swear-_

_The clearing. He will be there. Will you? _And with that the dragon withdrew from the contact. Leaving the king with a decision that he wouldn't struggle to make.

The dragon placed him massive claws around the injured warlock, ignoring the one short shout of distress leaving the warlock's lips. And prepared for a flight to the citadel. The warlock had a chance yet, and if he was to die, he would die with his friends.


	12. Kaina

Arthur flew onto Kaina with great speed, intending to race to Merlin's aid. Kaina whinnied and sped off into the dark evening as Arthur dug his heals into the horse. She was as black as the night itself, that is why Arthur had chosen her, he'd be well camoflauged in the night, no knight would notice him return.

As Kaina raced into the night, Arthur thought about the strange voice in his mind. It had seamed so ancient, so wise, but was it just his imagination? No, that was impossible. He'd had a conversation with it, hadn't he? It didn't seam like a voice he would make up. If he had to imagine a voice to comunicate with, it would be young and stupid, like Merlin. Merlin. What had happened to him?

Arthur was interupted from his thought only for a second as Kaina steered towards the wrong direction. He gently persuaded her to go left, not right, and she swiftly obayed. It was as though the horse could sense Arthur's distress and wished not to dissapoint. Kaina was faster than Arthur had expected because soon he had arrived at the clearing. He dismounted and secured Kaina to a tree.

Almost immediatley he saw him. Lying on the ground. Still. That was the first thing that disturbed Arthur. Merlin was still. He wasn't cleaning his arour or fidgeting as he stood next to Gaius in the council chambers, he wasn't fidling with the bottom of his shirt as Arthur scolded him for not doing a job properly. He wasn't doing anything. He was still.

Merlin wasn't talking. He wasn't backchatting, lecturing, joking. He wasn't singing, humming, whilstling. He was lying still, silent.

Arthur rushed to him and knelt down beside him. He turned him over and stared at his pale, lifeless face. He felt a hot liquid on his palm. Quickly he withdrew his hand and stared in horror at the red liquid on his hand. This wasn't right. This was a sick joke.

Arthur shouted loudly in anguish and let a single tear escape his eye and drift down hiis face. This was wrong. This was so, so wrong. He needed to get Merlin back to Camelot as soon as possible. Arthur rushed to Kaina and untied her. He tugged her to Merlin and tied her again to a closer tre. He then hoisted Merlin into the saddle and started to lead Kaina back to the city.

His mind raced as he trudged through the mud. Why had the voice helped him? What had happened to Merlin, or, more importantly, who was it he had to kill for Merlin's revenge?


	13. Duties

Merlin looked like death itself. No emotion crossed his face at any point in the long journey back to Camelot. No playful banter was exchanged at any point either, and it was getting to Arthur, it wasn't right. It wasn't supposed to be like this. Merlin shouldn't be lying stabbed in his saddle.

"Come on, girl." He said quietly to Kaina as he gently tugged on her reins. She whinnied and followed him obediently, wondering why her master was not riding her and why it was this man who always rode next to the horse and her rider on quests and hunts. Arthur made a clicking noise with his tongue when Kaina went in the wrong direction. Arthur looked back at Kaina's passenger for the millionth time, and for the millionth time, his face paled.

Blood was still seeping out of the nasty gash and turning Merlin's blue shirt a sickening purple colour. Merlin's face looked white as a sheet and a shean of sweat shone all across it. Merlin's eyelids remained closed but Arthur could see his friends eyes flitting aroun fitfully underneath them. Arthur placed his hand of Merlin's brow and sighed when he noticed that his fever was getting worse. Arthur stopped Kaina and walke over so he was next to Merlin. He clapped an affectionate hand on Merlin's back and rubbed in circles, knowing how much a stab wound could hurt even though your unconcious. Ne felt nothing but sympathy for the poor man in the saddle.

So the three walked slowly back to Camelot. Arthur was very careful when taking Merlin down from the saddle and gently he trudged up to the castle with him in his arms. He hesitated when outside Gaius' chambers, Merlin would be more comfortable in Arthur's own bed, wouldn't he? But didn't he need to be with Gaius so that he was closer to the old man so he could recieve proper medical attention? He decided to hand Merlin over to the elderly physician and stay with him.

The door flung open as Arthur slammed his shoulder against it. Gaius looked up from a book he was reading and rushed over to the two boys.

"Lay him on the bed quickly! What happened?" Arthur immediatley did as he was told and layed Merlin on the bed in his own room. Gaius started to examine Merlin. Arthur stood opposite Gaius, but right next to Merlin. He stood over his friend and watched as he lay still on the bed.

"Arthur? What happened?" Gaius stood back from the patient and pulled up a chair to sit on as Arthur did the same. Arthur explained everything, the voice in his head calling to him encluded.

"I can't make sense of that voice. How did it get into my head? How did it know about Merlin?" Just saying Merlin's name made Arthur feel slightly ill.

"Nore can I, sire." Obviously Gaius knew it was Kilgarrah. Everything added up. Merlin and Kilgarrah had gone out to solve the problem of Merlin's voices, Merlin had got himself stabbed (possibly by Morgana) and KIlgarrah had told Arthur via telepathy to come and take Merlin back to Camelot. Poor Merlin. Gaius just prayed that it wasn't all in vain and that Merlin and Kilgarrah had sorted out the problem.

Arthur dared hiself to look at his manservant. And when he did, he wished he hadn't. He looked feverish and sickly, nothing like the bubbly, annoying manservant he usually is. Arthur looked back over the past few days and shuddered, then he moved his chair as close as he could to Merlin's bed so his knees were touching the wooden frame. He wanted to get closer, he wanted to hold Merlin tight until he woke up, but he knew it wouldn't be right and that it would hurt him, so he put up with sitting in the old wooden chair.

"Gaius, whats wrong with him?" Arthur finally asked, very quietly.

"The wound's infected and he seams to have developped a fever. It's strange though..."

"What? What's strange?"

"When my other patients have had fevers, they toss fitfully. Merlin must be an exception... but it's just... strange."

"I agree. But this is Merlin we're talking about, Gaius. He probably defies every law and rule there is." Gaius smiled and nodded. He stood up and started to xit, when he reached the door he looked back to the royal, a look of confusion displayed clearly on his face.

"Sire you have duties, you cannot stay here."

"My first duty is to Merlin, Gaius. I'm not leaving him for one second.

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><p><strong>Can I just remind you that this is meant to be bromance NOT romance. x x x Enjoy the next chapter when I finally post it x x x <strong>

**Please Review!**


	14. Hurts

Arthur placed a cool rag on Merlin's forhead and ever so gently pressed down on it. Merlin twitched.

"C'mon, Merlin. I'm getting soooo tired of this." Arthur whispered as he tended to his friend.

Merlin had not moved since three days ago when Arthur had dragged him to Gaius. He had apparently been getting better, but Arthur failed to notice the change, and he was with Merlin 24:7. Uther simply thought that Arthur was out hunting and never once suspected that he was infact looking after his sick manservant.

"Merlin. Are you not listening to me, you idiot?"

Arthur sighed at the lack of a response. Arthur tugged back the blankets and stared at the nasty wound on Merlin's stomach. He and Gaius had bandaged it of course, but it still looked awfully painful. Gaius had said that it was no longer infected that very morning, so that gave Arthur some relief.

Arthur dared himself to look at Merlin's pale face. When he looked he saw blue eyes that were feverishly darting around the room, occasionally closing.

"Merlin!" Arthur smiled at him. Merlin just gave a quivering small smile back.

"Ar-thur?" He breathed, his eyes not really settling on him.

"Yes. How are you feeling"

"Ar-thur..." Merlin slowly closed his eyes.

"Merlin?" Arthur started panicking, if Merlin fell asleep, when would he wake up again?

"Ti...tired..."

"Alright. Sleep then, Merlin." Arthur hated saying it but he knew that he couldn't force Merlin to do something he didn't want to.

"Ar-thur..." Merlin mumbled as he fell asleep. Arthur shushed him gently and went back to keeping him cool.

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><p>Arthur was just falling asleep after a long day of looking after Merlin when he heard Merlin tossing around fitfully. Arthur immediatley rushed to his side.<p>

"Shhh. Hush, Merlin. Sleep." Arthur tried to comfort his friend but Merlin couldn't hear him. Then, Merlin jolted into a sitting pisition, scaring the life out if Arthur. Merlin sat still for a moment before crying, gripping his wound.

"Merlin?"

"Arthur! It hurts! It hurts, Arthur." Merlin muttered between sobs. Arthur gently lowered him back to the bed and called for Gaius. When the old man entereed he immediatley ran to Merlins side.

"Merlin! What happened, Arthur?" Merlin sobbed as the two conversed, eventually Gaius gave an order to Arthur and rushed out of the room.

"Merlin? Calm down. I know it hurts."

Merlin shook his head. "It's too much."

Arthur felt anger boil in his veins at the sight of his manservant looking so disorientated. "Who did this to you, Merlin?"

"Just a bandit... I killed him as he stabbed me." Merlin quickly fabricated. He felt the world spinning and soon he'd passed out.

"Great. GAIUS! HE'S FAINTED!" Arthur yelled. Gaius opened the door and just smiled.

"That's good. He's on the mend, Arthur. Let him rest." Arthur soon fell asleep himself in the old chair, smiling in his sleep as he realised that Merlin was healing, granted, slowly, but healing none the less.


	15. Past

Arthur had never left his side. A few times Merlin had woken up, and every time Arthur felt more and more hope sneek into him. Merlin most definitley _was_ on the mend, but he was so very tired all the time. It made Arthur sad, but he knew he would soon have his manservant back to normal... awake.

"Arthur." Came the soft mumble from the bed. Arthur slowly turned round to observe Merlin rubbing his head slowly, breathing quickly and looking as though he was going to cry. He was still lying down and his eyes were still closed. Arthur knew he had a head ache. He always did. Gaius said that they were a side effect from the medicine that Merlin had been resieving to heal his wound.

"It's alright, Merlin." Arthur sat next to Merlin on the bed and ruffled his hair. Merlin liked it when Arthur did this because it comforted him and calmed him down, even when he was asleep. Arthur thought it sweet that one simple thing had such an effect on Merlin, but he would never admit it to anyone, and he also wouldn't tell anyone else of Merlin's 'weak spot'. He tried not to use it as he thought it's effect on Merlin was just slightly scary. "How's your... err... cut?" Arthur stopped ruffling Merlin's hair once he'd calmed down a bit.

"It hurts... as always. I think it's healing though." Merlin sighed and sat up, leaning against the wall.

"That's good. I'll be expecting you at work tomorrow, then. You've already had the best part of a week off." The two boys laughed until Merlin clutched his stomach, where his wound was, in agony and had to fight to keep from crying. Arthur noticed this and one hand shot up to Merlin's hair. The young raven eventually calmed down and relaxed against the wall.

"Maybe not tomorrow." Merlin said in a whisper.

"Maybe not tomorrow." Arthur confirmed. And slowly, Merlin fell back onto the bed and soon he was asleep. Dreaming...

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><p><em>Merlin dreamed of the past. He dreamed of the knife, spinning through the air slowly as time slowed down. Morgana's hair flowing gently in the wind, with a sort of meacing ura about it. The smile on her lips. That evil smirk. Before. The scene changed.<em>

_Him and Will were running from bully, they jumped over a log and soon heard the thud of their chaser jumping over it a few seconds later. Will laughed but Merlin was petrified. When they met a dead end, the bully came sauntering over. Smiling an awful smile, a fist raised, preparing to beat the two for trying to get away. Merlin yelled and sent the bully flying backwards into a tree. Will stared at him, shocked. _

_Many memories of Merlin's past flashed through his mind, all of them ones that had caused him fear. And no matter how long it had been since they had occoured, be it years or days, they still petrified him as they had done then._


	16. Avalon

Merlin could feel his health improving. He felt the wound become less and less painful and he woke up with only minor head aches when they used to be full blown out migraines. Merlin still felt awful, though. He still remembered, and that was enough even without the pain and the head aches.

He remembered everything, and his dreams refused to let him forget them.

He remembered tiny things from when he was small to huge battles with Arthur. From arguments with his mother and Gaius, to one on one combat with his enemies.

But every time he woke up in his bed after a nightmare, Arthur would always be there, on the old wooden chair next to his bed. He'd always ask him first if he wanted to talk about it, if Merlin said no, then he'd leave it, if Merlin said yes and started talking, he'd listen quietly, occasionally nodding his head and asking a question. And Merlin appreciated the company very much and he _did _of course respect Gaius' care when he was able to sit with him, in all, he felt well looked after.

At first he was annoyed when he discovered that Arthur wasn't going to leave because Merlin wouldn't get a chance to explain what happened to Gaius, that was, if he could stay up long enough in the first place, but over time, Merlin had grown to like Arthur being with him. It showed he cared, it also meant that Merlin never felt alone and he knew that Arthur would speak to him and joke with him and help him if he asked for it.

Arthur was asleep at that moment, and Merlin was barely awake. But then, he realised somethings that he should truly be thankful for.

1. The Dragon had saved him.

2. The voices had stopped.

The Dragon had saved him. Merlin still couldn't believe it. Kilgarrah had always seamed to Merlin to be an advise giver (and maybe a bit of a horse in some respects). He'd never thought of him to be a savior.

Merlin decided then that he would definitley have to speak with him, and soon.

The voices had stopped. Merlin and Kilgarrah had cured Merlin of one of the worst things Merlin had experienced! They'd done it! Merlin could live in peace. It had seamed like so long since Merlin had had a normal day. A day where he didn't have to beg them to keep away. A day where his energy had been cruelly stollen from him at leats twice. And now Merlin wouldn't have to fear sleeping, for they had gone. And that had been the last kindness Morgana had done for him. The Witches Last Good Deed. And Merlin knew he'd be eternally grateful to her.

Merlin would have to try to make contact with Morgana. He had to thank her. He had to (eventually) tell her his secret. He had to tell her of the wonderful world that Arthur was creating. Because he'd heard her last thoughts. He'd heard her wonder about herself. He'd heard her cry. And he'd never forget that she was his friend, and she always will be to Merlin, even though she was 'evil'.

Mogana was not evil in Merlin's eyes. She never meant for these things to happen. She'd been such a lovely, caring person untill Morgause currupted her. But Merlin didn't blame Morgause either, and he hoped that she was happy wherever she was. He cared for everyone of his friends and enemies. He hoped they got what they desserved (in a good way) and he hoped that everyone of them had a special place in Avalon, and one day, he'd join them. But not yet. Right now, he was very much alive, and glad to be, but he did not fear death, because he knew that he would be reunited with all of the people he cared the most about and missed.

"You look like you're thinking hard, Merlin." Came Arthur's voice.

"Hmm..." Merlin hummed.

"What about?"

"Nothing much."

"Well, whatever's keeping you up must be interesting."

"I'm dreaming."

"But you're awake..."

"I'm imagining then."

"Okay, imagining what?"

"Avalon."

"You're not going to die, Merlin. Gaius and I know you're recovering and you know it aswell, so stop worrying and go to sleep. I can see you're tired."

"I'm only thinking! I know I'm not going to die..." Merlin lay in a more comfortable position, a sleeping position. "But just..." Merlin _was _quite tired. "Imagine it..." Merlin fell asleep, leaving Arthur with very similar thoughts to Merlin. And soon, Arthur wasn't afraid either. Death, was welcome when destiny desided it was time.


End file.
